Woman Says Husband ‘Ruined the Birth’ of Their Child After Refusing Hospital Trip During Labor
UNITED STATES — A new mother has shared an emotional account of how her husband’s insistence on a home birth led to what she describes as one of the most traumatic experiences of her life. In an online post that quickly gained widespread attention, the woman said her husband refused to take her to the hospital during labor, leaving her in pain and fear for nearly three days.
Husband Pressured Her Into a Home Birth
The woman, whose daughter is now eight weeks old, said the conflict began early in her pregnancy when her husband began pressuring her to give birth at home. “I really don’t know why he was so adamant on it, but he was,” she wrote. “At first, I brushed him off and told him I’d think about it since I was only six weeks pregnant.”
Over the course of the pregnancy, her husband continued to push the idea of a home birth — even speaking over her at doctor’s appointments when physicians asked about her birth plan. His mother also encouraged the decision, dismissing the woman’s concerns about medical safety.
“I ended up telling my husband that I would take myself to the hospital when it was time,” she explained. “He acted as if he didn’t hear me.”
Labor Lasted Three Days Without Hospital Care
At 39 weeks, the woman went into labor and begged her husband to take her to the hospital. Instead, he called a doula and told her she was overreacting.
“I begged, absolutely begged my husband to take me to the hospital where my doctor is. He wouldn’t,” she recalled. “He spoke to me condescendingly and called the doula instead. I was in labor for about three days, active labor for around the last 22 hours.”
The woman described intense pain, fear, and isolation throughout the process. “I cried the whole time,” she wrote. “I just felt something was wrong. I was scared and often they left me alone.”
According to her account, the doula told her that if active pushing reached 24 hours, she would have to go to the hospital — but the mother ultimately gave birth at home before reaching that point.
“When she was finally out, I don’t even remember wanting to hold her,” she said. “I just remember crying out of relief.”
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Aftermath: ‘He Absolutely Ruined It for Me’
Following the birth, the woman’s doctor expressed shock that she had delivered outside the hospital. “She was very concerned,” the woman said. “I was so upset.”
In the weeks since, the mother says she has struggled to move past the experience and told her husband repeatedly that he “absolutely ruined” the birth of their child.
“I truly never want to go through that again,” she said. “I love my daughter so much, but it was horrible, and it was entirely his fault.”
Despite her distress, she said her husband has been dismissive of her emotions, often rolling his eyes when she brings up the trauma. “He tells me how mothers are ‘strong’ and how I’m not trying to be strong,” she explained. “He says if we have another baby, we’ll ‘see’ — but I told him I’ll never do a home birth again.”
Experts Highlight Risks and Autonomy in Birth Decisions
Medical professionals stress that while home births can be safe under the right conditions, they require careful planning, medical oversight, and — most importantly — the consent of the mother.
“Forcing a woman into a birth plan she’s uncomfortable with is not only unethical but dangerous,” said Dr. Laura Bennett, a maternal health specialist. “A mother’s physical and emotional safety must come first. Informed consent is central to every medical decision, including childbirth.”
Studies show that unplanned or high-risk home births can increase the chances of complications for both mother and baby, particularly if there is limited access to emergency care.
A Call for Respect and Understanding
The story has resonated with thousands of readers online, many expressing sympathy for the mother and outrage at her husband’s behavior. Several women shared similar stories of partners or family members pressuring them during pregnancy, emphasizing the importance of bodily autonomy and medical choice.
While the woman says she is now physically recovered, she continues to process the emotional toll of the experience. “Everyone around me acts like this is so normal, but it’s not,” she wrote. “I can’t possibly be wrong for saying he ruined it. He did.”
Do you believe partners should have a say in how or where childbirth takes place, or should the decision be entirely up to the mother? Share your thoughts at SaludaStandard-Sentinel.com.
